While shopping in Target today I overheard a couple discussing which Barbie Doll to buy their daughter for Christmas, and tweeted a portion of their exchange. A response to that Tweet and the subsequent banter inspired my Obama Barbie Collection.
To commemorate the last four years of excellence in achievement and performance, Mattel introduces a new series of Barbie Dolls: Obama Barbies.
OBAMA BARBIES
Secretary of the Treasury Barbie: Now with her own printing press!Secretary of State Barbie: Now with her own fainting couch!
Speaker of the House Barbie 2010 Edition: Complete with oversized gavel.
Attorney General Barbie: Sold with one illegal firearm your child can mail to Mexico. **Postage sold separately.
UN Ambassador Barbie: Redacted script of lies inside!
First Lady Barbie: Ugly, pretentious clothing sold separately.
TSA Barbie: Now with X-ray glasses.
Chris Matthews Ken (Tingly Leg Edition): Guaranteed to thrill your child.
Acorn Barbie: Now with a money laundering guide.
Westboro Church Barbie: Includes blank signs so your child can craft their own hateful messages.
Iranian Dictator Barbie: Now with partially constructed nuclear bomb and negotiation table. ***Obama Barbie sold separately
Democrat Barbie: Now with an erasable Bill of Rights.
Press Secretary Barbie: Includes free book, The Art of Lying.
Freeloader Barbie: Complete with Obama money and an Obama phone.
Communications Director Barbie: Now includes glossy photos of Chairman Mao.
Taliban Barbie: Rolling head and sword inside!
Infidel Barbie: Now with a detachable head. ***Taliban Barbie sold separately.
Senior Presidential Advisor Barbie: Now bundled with 5 Secret Service Barbies.
Trump Barbie: Obama’s birth certificate and college records inside!
Union Barbie: Complete with brass knuckles, baseball bat, list of demands, one non-negotiable contract, and a Get of Jail Free Card.
Planned Parenthood Barbie: Comes with five condoms your child can share with her friends.
Black Panther Barbie: Billy club and Get out of Jail Free card inside!
Green Jobs Barbie: Post-dated pink slip inside!
Voter Barbie: Now sold with a programmable voting machine so your child can control the outcome of the election.
Mainstream Media Barbie: Complete with five government issued “news” stories.
Primary Care Physician Barbie: Reimbursement schedule and list of approved treatments inside!
Social Security Barbie: Currently on back-order.
Task Force Barbie: Free copy of Problem Solving for Dummies inside!
College Graduate Barbie: Loan repayment schedule inside.
***Jobs sold separately with Entrepreneur Barbie.
Entrepreneur Barbie: Out of production until further notice.
****FINALLY, WITHOUT FURTHER ADIEU…
POTUS BARBIE: Character and integrity sold separately.
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