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Flashback: John Kerry Declares All Chemical Weapons Removed from Syria

Department of State‏Verified account @StateDept

.@JohnKerry: Today the last 8% of declared chemical weapons were removed from #Syria. Great work done by all involved http://go.usa.gov/9N7H 

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8:32 PM - 23 Jun 2014

A chemical gas attack in Syria killed over 70 people on Tuesday, surprising the international community and drawing outrage from the United States. 

Most surprised of all was former Secretary of State John Kerry, who declared that the last 8% of chemical weapons had been successfully removed from Syria back in June of 2014.

“Today, the international maritime task force completed the critical mission of removing the last 8 percent of declared chemical weapons precursors from Syria. With this step, 100 percent of the declared chemicals are out of war-torn Syria,” the former Secretary of State said in a statement released June 23, 2014. 

I think you missed some jackass. Remember this...

Chicago Math Test

Finally.  A practical  math test.   Chicago schools are finally starting to
teach practical math that kids can use in real-world situations . . .

1. Lajames has an AK-47 with a 200-round clip. He usually misses 6 of every
10 shots and he uses 13 rounds per drive-by shooting. How many mofos can
Lajames ice on a drive-by before he gotta reload?

2. Willie has 2 ounces of cocaine. If  he sell an 8 ball to Antonio for $320
and 2 grams to Juan  for $85 per gram, what be the street value of the rest
of  his shit?

3. Dwayne pimps 3 ho's. If the price is $85 per trick, how many tricks per
day must each ho turn to support Dwayne's $800 per day crack habit ?

4. Raul wants to cut the pound of cocaine he bought  for $40,000 to make 20%
profit. How many ounce bags will he need to make to get the 20% upside?

5. Ray-Ray gets $2000 for a stolen BMW, $1500 for stealing a Corvette, and
$1000 for a 4 x 4. If he steal 1 BMW, 2 Corvettes and 3 4x4's, how many more
Corvettes must he steal to make the 10k for his brother's bail?

6. Pedro get 6 years for murder. He also get $10,000 for the hit. If his
common-law wife spend  $100 of his hit money per month, how much money will
be left  when he get out?

7. If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square feet and the average
letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can be sprayed with three 8 oz.
cans of spray paint with 20% paint left over?

8. Tyrone knocked up 4 girls in the gang. There be 20 girls in his gang.
What be the percentage of bitches Tyrone knocked up ?

9. Lafawnda is a lookout for the gang. Lafawnda also has a boa constrictor
that eats 5 rats per week at a cost of $5 per rat. If Lafawnda makes $700 a
week as a lookout, how many weeks can she feed her snake with one week's
income ?

10. Marvin steals Juan's skateboard As Marvin skates away at 15 mph, Juan
load his .357 Magnum piece. If  it take Juan 20 seconds to load his piece,
how far away will  Marvin be when he get whacked?